Sunday, March 13, 2011

oh hai late 30's

Today blew burrito chunks. I start my new job tomorrow morning and had to buy new pants to go with the shirt I have to wear. It's like a button-up, fitted shirt, not bad for a work shirt but nothing I'd ever wear in my day to day real life. Plus the only medium they had on hand was brown, also not a color I ever wear. So long story short, time for new pants to go with said shirt.
One would think that some "suitable for work" khaki pants would be easy to find, amirite? WRONG, BIATCH. It took 3 hours and five stores and a lot of sighing and florescent lights and comparisons of my thighs to cottage cheese and "what the hell happened to me?"s to find a pair of pants that are good for work and comfortable and fit properly and look halfway decent. Gloria friggin Vanderbilt. I bought Gloria Vanderbilt pants today. The last bastion of youth, crossed off the list in red ink.
So of course I came right home and made a grocery list of healthy foods and printed out my gym schedule and did 100 situps! J/K, I ate a buttload of mozzarella sticks and drank two glasses of wine. Then I took a long hot bath and contemplated liposuction


  1. haha. I heard that, girl...

    I bought a bikini top, came home to try it on, laughed at the thought, and returned it the next day for a sensible one piece.

    I feel ya, girl...

    Good luck today, you're gonna rock the shit out of that place in your Vanderbilt jeans, holla.

  2. HEY guess what I found out today? Gloria doesn't just make awesome work pants for sassy gals in their late 30's...she also makes awesome children. I had no idea she was Anderson Cooper's mother!!!