I got goalz n stuff--super long catch up post

So many things I wish for, but I'm going to narrow it down to things I think are actually attainable in 2013. Some of the things are about me. I'm going to be 40 in May and there are some things that I need to do to be happy at 40. I have already started some changes (really small ones!) and am adding another small change every day or two while holding on to the others. Like a snowball, kinda. One thing I've tried before and failed and failed at is getting rid of wheat. I KNOW that wheat and my body do not get along. I KNOW that when I am not eating wheat I feel wonderful and weight starts coming off and my belly gets smaller. I have more energy. Fewer headaches. Fewer belly aches. I know this. It's something worth succeeding at. So I will continue to strive to be wheat free, even if I fail some or back slide some. I don't think I have to detail why wheat is such a powerful enemy, especially around the holidays. I mean, the rolls alone. **drool** Potatoes are another foe, but baby steps, here. Wheat is my main rival and I think once it's conquered the other foods that make me feel shitty will be much easier to vanquish. I have other small goals and changes that I'm doing like drinking water, and lots of it. Getting up earlier than the kids and having time to plan for the day and just be alone for a few minutes. Exercise is coming, baby steps baby steps. I REALLY want a bicycle. Will be budgeting that in, hopefully in the next few months.

Some of the things are about our house. Our house needs work. Oh hey, look! I made the understatement of the year. We got issues. Plumbing issues. Window issues. Central air issues (being that we, like, don't have it). Our carpet sucks. The kitchen needs repainting. The roof leaks over the porch, which really sucks because we have a great porch (once we paint it!). The garage door needs replacing, our driveway needs gravel, some low limbs need trimming, and after it's all done and just the way we want it inside? There are plans to paint the outside.  Now don't think I'm ungrateful or hate my house. Nooo, no, no, no. I freakin' love my house, warts and all. Any shit talking my house is ill-advised. I'm allowed to say my house is shitty. You.are.not. I guess the point of this rambling is that we are fixing our house one step at a time, in the order that WE, the people who live here, deem correct. I don't need perfection and the suggestion that my house is not good enough makes me pretty darn angry. I live here. Hello. My kids LIVE HERE. So yeah. One thing at a time and we'll get where we need to be without going into debt or jacking up our budget. And I'm gonna detail those steps here, you lucky possums!  (as my friend Doe would say) Priority one is the stupid driveway. I've priced gravel and that is within the budget in 3 pay periods, as is a plumber to fix some ongoing issues that are manageable but a pain in the ass. After that we'll look into the other issues and how to tackle them. It would be so nice to have central air next summer! But insulation must be blown in, first, or it would be a waste of money. So many things! But I am excited by the prospect of getting our house the way we want it, even though it's overwhelming. Baby steps! NOW, those are the goals for fixing up the house. Keeping house? That's....something else entirely. The clutter monster keeps creeping up and having to be slain, over and over again. I have systems for many things, but clutter still has a strong presence here and I don't like it one bit.  My car is the worst. It's like a mobile garbage can/laundry basket. Organizational goals will be detailed later, once I've got an idea of what I want to do with this problem.

My kids need one on one time with E and with me. That's a goal that's going to be difficult, but attainable with some creative thinking and follow through. I took M to a movie after his dentist appointment on Friday, just him and me. It was so nice to have that time together!  I'd like to do some more things like that and for E to, too. I get lots of time with X, since I'm home all day with him during the week after preschool. We've started playing Uno an Wii games together in the evenings instead of all going our separate ways and plugging into something. Crafting is fun, too, and something the boys and I enjoy, maybe not E so much. I do best with concrete plans, plugged into my calendar with a reminder pop up. Pretty soon it will be Christmas break so I have a few ideas for things to do together so we don't drive each other nuts. They'll have new toys and things to keep them busy, too, but that will bring more clutter. Being a grown up is so super fun, don't you agreeee? 

There's a post brewing all up in my head, and my mind, and my brain. Stay tuned.

5 More Mom Things I Don't Do

5.Clean, scrub, and sanitize everything within an inch of its life. I don't buy antibacterial ANYTHING. Studies show that all that Lysol and sanitized this and antibacterial that actually LOWER our immune systems. Plus I am lazy and cheap, so less to do and less to buy? Sign me up.
4.Never let my kids get dirty. Boys like mud. I have a hose. 'Nuff said.
3.Not allow my kids to see me as a regular person with human needs and shortcomings. Yes, I am the Mom and I have Authoritah, but I'm not a MomBot 5000 whose only purpose in life is to be their mother. I'm also my husband's wife, my job's employee, my mother's daughter, my friends' friend, and just plain old Stacey. Stacey is a real person who sometimes says cuss words, sometimes has a glass of wine, and sometimes wants to be left the hell alone for awhile. And that's OK.
2.Put them first. Sorry, I don't. They are not first. My marriage is first. When they are grown and gone, Eric and I will still be here, together. Our marriage brought them into the world and sustains their lives as they know them. They are a really close second, like photo-finish second, but they are not first.
1.Worry about them constantly. When you worry it says "I don't have the faith that God will handle this." and I do, really. Also unless you have super powers, it does absolutely not one teeny bit of good and is even harmful. It also teaches your kids that the world is a fearful place and then they worry, too. Sometimes it is hard when big bad things are happening, not to worry and fret. But to worry about trivial things or even things that might happen or could possibly happen at some point maybe? No way. Plus it shortens your life and makes what's left miserable. I like to be happy, not miserable. Don't you?

10 Mom Things that I don't do

1. Explain every single thing in a sing-songy voice and make sure the child understands WHY we don't approach the strange doggie, play with matches, or mess with the knobs on the bathtub. The reason why is because I said so, and that's that.
2. Get involved with every little squabble and bump along the road of play with siblings, friends, and family. If it ain't bleeding or on fire, I don't want to hear about it. Go play.
3. Sign them up for every activity available and have them busy from morning till night. If my kid doesn't show an interest and/or aptitude, we don't join, especially if it cuts into family time or dinner or Glee.
4. Have a "philosophy" about child-rearing. I got three letters for your "philosophy"--L.O.L. Our family uses what works for us, each particular kid, and our family in that moment.
5. Conform to a rigorous and well-planned-out schedule. Not happening at our house. We do a lot of things routinely, but definitely not scheduled. We eat when we're hungry and sleep when we are tired. If we don't have to get up early in the morning for a really good reason, we don't.
6. Tell them bullshit lies about drugs. Marijuana ain't meth, and if you think your kid believes that they are the same then you're doing everyone a big disservice, including yourself since they'll know you're full of shit and think everything you say is alarmist and crazy and met with a big eye-roll. I don't want my kids doing either, but I am not going to insult their intelligence by making them equal. There are reasons not to smoke pot, and there are other, different, more grave and serious reasons not to do crack or heroin or meth.
7. Tell them bullshit lies about sex. Babies don't come from storks or cabbage leaves, and we don't pretend that they do. We don't pretend that sex is a dirty and secret and taboo topic, either. When we get questions, we tell the age-appropriate truth, up to and including pictures of disease-riddled genitalia. You're welcome.
8. Never let them fail and take charge of things they should be doing themselves. Yeah, no. I'm a little too busy doing my stuff to do all of their stuff, too. There's no teacher like natural consequences.
9. Buy them everything they ask for/want. First of all, I can't, and second of all, I wouldn't if I could.
10.Make arbitrary rules about things that just do not matter in the long run. Wanna wear your snow boots today, in April, with shorts ? WHY NOT? Seriously, why not?

Date Night!

Our date Friday night was just wonderful. When I got home from work Eric was showered, shaved, and had the directions printed out to the parking garage, theater, and 2 restaurants he thought I might like to go to. He also had an outfit picked out but wanted me to OK it before he put it on. LOL (sersly, the man cannot dress himself) I was really glad he made an effort for us to have a nice date night. Anyway, I got my shower and all (my clothes didn't come in, but I had a backup outfit). The restaurants were both fish places and it occurred to me that on a Friday during Lent we might not get in and out in time to get to the show. So we decided to hit the Mexican place down the street. They are awesome. We had a great meal and I had a gigantic margarita.

This was the only pic we took that night. There was no photography allowed inside the theater. :(

We got to the theater in perfect time and discovered how great our seats were. They were pretty up close and personal. For those of you who don't know who Don Williams is, he's pretty much a living legend in the world of country music. He is 71 years old, and had hits in the 70s and 80s like Tulsa Time, Amanda, Lord, I Hope This Day is Good, Heartbeat in the Darkness, You're My Best Friend, and his biggest hit was probably I Believe in You.

I have loved him since I can remember, 30+ years. I never thought I'd get to see him live, since he's been retired. He did a small tour last year that I found out about after it happened, and I thought I'd missed my chance.

He was fantastic, and I'm not just saying that through rose-colored fan-ears. He was really, really good. He performed for an hour and a half, and played most of his hits. His encore was Mel McDaniel's Louisiana Saturday Night, which was a nice unexpected treat. He played my favorite (You're My Best Friend) but didn't play my other favorite (Say It Again), but man it was a great show. I am such a spazmo--I cried through half the show, for real. It was just very emotional. My husband loves my spazmo emotional crying, though. It's one of the things that makes me, me, I guess. LOL (I cry at church, too, most of the time)

Anyway, y'all, this was a Bucket List item for me, so I am so so happy it went so well. I will be humming Don Williams songs while I clean my funky "Mom just got a job!" house up today, for sure.

Gardens...how do they work?

It's about time to start thinking about my garden. I am the world's worst gardener. Nobody can kill plants like me. It's amazing. But last year, with my MIL's ingenuity and a little perseverance, I turned $50 worth of soil, seeds, and plants and hundreds of dollars worth of labor into $40 worth of produce, dammit. I was really proud of my little plot. Most of my crop pointed and laughed at me (right before they turned brown and died), but some of them thrived. Jalapenos, basil, and cherry tomatoes grew like crazy for me. We had margherita pizza for lunch almost every day and a shitload of jalapeno poppers for snacks. I never knew I liked jalapenos, cherry tomatoes, and basil until I grew them myself. 

This year I might venture into a couple of different types of tomatoes and maybe attempt strawberries again. I told myself I would read up and study up and really just be a gardening guru wizard this year, but that totes did not happen. I was going to build two more raised beds, invent a new watering system, takes some classes, and read Gardening for Dummies. I was gonna take the gardening world by storm, y'all. But here it is March and I have not done any of those things. Maybe there is still time to read Gardening for Dummies? But I am definitely going to improve on my crop from last year. This year I plan on making at least $41 worth of produce, for sure. 

oh hai late 30's

Today blew burrito chunks. I start my new job tomorrow morning and had to buy new pants to go with the shirt I have to wear. It's like a button-up, fitted shirt, not bad for a work shirt but nothing I'd ever wear in my day to day real life. Plus the only medium they had on hand was brown, also not a color I ever wear. So long story short, time for new pants to go with said shirt.
One would think that some "suitable for work" khaki pants would be easy to find, amirite? WRONG, BIATCH. It took 3 hours and five stores and a lot of sighing and florescent lights and comparisons of my thighs to cottage cheese and "what the hell happened to me?"s to find a pair of pants that are good for work and comfortable and fit properly and look halfway decent. Gloria friggin Vanderbilt. I bought Gloria Vanderbilt pants today. The last bastion of youth, crossed off the list in red ink.
So of course I came right home and made a grocery list of healthy foods and printed out my gym schedule and did 100 situps! J/K, I ate a buttload of mozzarella sticks and drank two glasses of wine. Then I took a long hot bath and contemplated liposuction